Accepting and appreciating your body
Listen to the audio version. A big part of healing your relationship with your body is learning to accept it. Accepting your body includes appreciating all that it does for you and being grateful for it. We often direct a lot of judgment toward our bodies. While it’s great to have health and fitness goals, unnecessary self-criticism can be harmful to our relationship with our bodies and to meeting those goals.
Acceptance and body neutrality
Body acceptance is a component of body neutrality, which is a position that lies between body positivity and being judgmental or critical of your body. Forcing ourselves to say that we love our bodies can be intimidating, and frankly, not always genuine. Body neutrality means that there’s no pressure to love your body when you don’t (although it’s wonderful if you do!). Instead, it’s about accepting, respecting, and appreciating what it can do for you. It’s also about detaching your inherent worth from your body or how it appears. Body neutrality also includes respect for your body. In this post, I will mainly discuss how to begin to accept and appreciate your body.
Here are a few things that will help you accept and appreciate your body:
Monitor – and challenge – unhelpful thoughts and feelings about your body
Face it, we all think negative or less-than-helpful thoughts about our bodies from time to time. That’s ok. Remember, you don’t have to love your body! Observing, thinking about, and possibly challenging and reframing these thoughts, however, can have a positive effect on the process of accepting your body. First of all, simply observe these thoughts, without judging yourself for thinking them. Where do these thoughts come from? Perhaps they stem from a genuine concern for your health or the strength of your body. They may come from exposure to negative body-talk from the media or social media, or from past conversations with friends or family.
You might even want to write down these thoughts in a journal. Then, either think, or write, some counter-arguments. For example, if your thought is “I hate my inner thighs!,” try challenging that thought with another thought about how your thighs have helped you walk, hike up a trail, run a mile, or chased after your toddler or pet. An unhelpful thought about your arms, as well, could be redirected to a thought about your respect for how they help you carry groceries, or a desire to strengthen them to engage in more demanding activities!
Try not to compare your body to others – online or in-person
It’s not necessary to compare your body to others – your body is unique! This is common, however, especially when pursuing a health or fitness goal. There are many social media accounts devoted to fitness and body sculpting, and they have both positive and negative aspects. On one hand, they can be motivating, and many of them can be educational. On the other hand, comparing our bodies to the often ideal bodies on many of these social media accounts, or in the media, can be defeating, as well as detrimental to the process of accepting our bodies.
Also, remember that everything is not as it seems online or in the media. We know that social media photos, as well as those in magazines, can be filtered or heavily photoshopped. Also, look at the model or influencer’s age or lifestyle. Do they match yours? Are they professional bodybuilders, or do they make a living from their bodies? Do they have more time and ability to delegate resources to their bodies?
Of course, there are many people with sculpted physiques in real life, too, and that’s great! Again, this can be very motivating. However, comparing your body to someone else’s isn’t helpful. Your body is unique – as is theirs! Accepting your body and its uniqueness, and avoiding comparison, can go a long way to healing your relationship with your body.
Appreciate all the things your body can do for you!
A key part of accepting your body is to appreciate all the things it can do for you! If you’ve ever been injured, you know what it’s like to be unable to engage in daily activities, or performing simple tasks like walking to the mailbox! After recovery, we often feel so grateful for the ability to do the things we missed doing, but we quickly forget about this feeling. Be grateful for all of the things your body can do for you – even if your body can’t do many things. If you are experiencing an illness or are disabled, try working with a professional that can help you find activities you can do and enjoy while working within your limits.
Think about all the things your body has done for you throughout your life, and all of the activities it helps you do! If you love hiking, like I do, appreciate your legs and the ability to walk on two feet! If you have birthed children, appreciate your body for carrying a baby and giving birth to it. If you carry groceries inside your home to feed yourself, try appreciating the strength of your arms for giving you the ability to do that! It might sound silly, but it goes a long way toward body acceptance.
Try not to “beat yourself up” while pursuing your health and fitness goals!
Exercising and eating nutrient-dense food are beneficial for our health. Having fitness goals is also helpful. However, if you are pursuing a health, fitness, or weight-loss goal, try not to beat yourself up if you feel like you aren’t making the progress you want, or if the process is going more slowly than you had planned. Accepting your body and respecting it during the process is a good way to maintain the resilience needed during “plateau” periods as well.
Try to focus on movement that makes you feel good! It’s great to do exercises that strengthen your body, or do certain routines that you think will help you. However, when working toward body acceptance, try to incorporate fitness activities that feel good and bring you joy!
Remember, movement is fun, and you’re more likely to stick an exercise routine in in the long term if you enjoy doing it! By focusing on movement that makes you feel good, you honor your body and what it can do for you, and feel more in tune with your body as it moves. You are less likely to criticize yourself when you hit a rough patch, because you know your body will adjust and be resilient.
Eating nutrient-dense food is beneficial for your overall health. However, try not to beat yourself up for eating something “bad” – remember that food choices are not moral choices!
Accepting and appreciating your body can help you reach your desired fitness and health goals, because you will approach them from a positive mindset. Just because you might not be where you want to be at a given time, doesn’t mean you can’t enjoy the process! Living in the present moment can help you accept your body during the process of your health or fitness journey.
Wear clothing that fits and makes you feel good!
Instead of buying the size you want to get into, buy clothing that fits you and makes you feel good! Try to avoid “squeezing into” a clothing item just because of its size number, or wearing clothing that makes you feel unhappy with your body.
Unfollow unhelpful social media accounts
If you use social media, and certain accounts make you feel bad about yourself or your body, rethink why you follow them. Do they motivate you or educate you, and do you feel uplifted after viewing their content? Then it’s probably fine to keep following them. If not, consider muting or “unfollowing” them, while you learn to accept your own unique and powerful body!
At the same time, consider following social media accounts that show a variety of body shapes and sizes. You may find that you appreciate your own body more when you see a wider variety of bodies represented on your social media feed.
Try to stop talking about bodies!
If you notice that you, your friends, or your family talk about bodies a lot, maybe suggest a discussing a different topic! There are so many more things to talk about. This is especially important to do while you work toward being more accepting and appreciative of your body.
References
Poirer, A., (n.d.). “5 Steps to Body Neutrality.” National Eating Disorders Association. https://www.nationaleatingdisorders.org/blog/5-steps-body-neutrality
