Forgiveness and the New Year
As the year comes to a close, it’s common to reflect on what went well and what could have been better. It’s a time of reflection, pause, and acceptance. Many of us set intentions and goals, or make plans for the new year.
This year has not been easy. However, I had many happy and memorable moments. As I reflect on the ups and downs of 2021, my mind, as it often does at year’s end, returns to the power of forgiveness. I often forget about its power. So, I thought by writing about forgiveness on here, it would remind me practice it.
Forgiveness helps us let go. It’s also a great way to say goodbye to the year! First of all, forgive people who have hurt you, intentionally or unintentionally. Remember, forgiveness is for you, not them. Even when you forgive someone else, you are always doing it for yourself. So, at the end of this year, forgive those who hurt you. Let it go, and release it into the ether. It doesn’t mean that what happened was right. It doesn’t excuse poor behavior or mean that you shouldn’t feel hurt. What it does is provide you a way out. You can move on and leave whatever happened in the past.
As the year closes, forgive yourself. Forgive yourself for any time you played small. For any time you deprioritized your own needs, when you shouldn’t have. Forgive yourself for saying things in the heat of the moment. Forgive yourself for hurting anyone unintentionally. Yes, apologize, do better, but don’t swell on it.
You should also forgive yourself for any habits you want to change. Especially during this pandemic, many of us have picked up damaging or unproductive habits. This could be eating foods that don’t make you feel good, drinking too much, spending too much time mindlessly scrolling social media, or neglecting fitness. Whatever it may be, if you hope to change, forgive yourself first. Guilt only serves to make you feel bad about yourself.
All of this sounds easy, and very freeing. It is freeing, but it is not easy. Forgiving yourself means coming to terms with parts of yourself that you may not like. For things in the year that you regret. But once you are done, you can truly let go and open yourself up to new paradigms and possibilities.
As for me, what am I forgiving myself for this year? While I have accomplished some things in 2021: starting a graduate program, coaching new clients, writing more, staying as active as possible, and starting my audio blog, I definitely have regrets. There were times I acted out of emotion rather than reason, I have been blunt when I should have used a little more restraint, I neglected the strength training regime I began at the beginning of the year, and have unfinished projects everywhere. That’s ok. I know what I need to do going forward, and I forgive myself.
By forgiving ourselves, we have a clean slate. This can be done at any time, not just near the new year. I always have to remind myself to look forward, not back.
Happy New Year! I hope 2022 is a wonderful year for all of you. May you receive peace, healing, and growth.
